Everybody has had a devil day. One of those bathroom days where you stand in front of a mirror shaking your finger and berating yourself for poor communications. Even on successful days, there is still that devil on our shoulder saying ” You don’t have credibility. They don’t respect you. You confuse them at every turn. You think you said one thing but they remember you saying something completely different.”
However, there are four fundamental truths to communication and if you follow them, you can stop your wagging bathroom finger.
Be prepared.
Teams are tough, especially towards those that are closer to the big picture and its details. People on teams expect you to know the details so prepare. Each day, before the mirror asks you, prepare for the day. You have to care about their day to show that you care about them. You need to anticipate. If they are your first priority you will be prepared for their questions.
Walk the information line.
Just like lack of preparation gives you too little information which they interpret as lack of care, too much information will set their eyes looking for an exit. To communicate well you need to be a sharp listener and that includes body language. It will show you when you are not getting to the point. You need to edit yourself. They will begin to see you as a caring communicator and that will build trust.”
Give specific answers to specific questions without being short.
Your teammates will evaluate you as aloof if you are too general or a boor if you are too specific. Empathy will help show you how to explore questions until you can give them a specific answers. Before you speak out with a generality repeat what you heard and ask them to clarify it. Prepare to address the exact point they are raising with specifics. But don’t wander into the details too deeply. You need to stay on point. Your communication will improve dramatically just by focusing on this alone. It is the key divider between respect and resentment.
Publish everything you communicate.
Teams will smile and nod while you are talking because they want to impress you. They may not have heard a thing. Give them a way to back track on their own time. Make sure they know that everything you want them to know is also available in a folder of notes that they can get to.
Using these four truths on every team, no matter what your role will make today good and tomorrow better.